I've struggled finding the words to share the whirlwind that has been my life these past few weeks. It has been completely and utterly surreal. Sometimes I am just waiting to wake up from the nightmare. On Monday, August 20th at around 7pm I received a call from my parents that my sister Malissa had passed out at the gym and was being taken to the hospital. They were on their way to Richmond and would let me know if I needed to come when I got there. Due to my current family situation: husband and child, I can't just up and run to her side like I would have in the past regardless of the severity of the situation. It takes my parents about 2 hours to get from Carrsville to Richmond. It takes me about the same time, but I'm driving down from Fairfax County. It was about 9:30 when I got the call that I needed to be there immediately. They found blood on her brain with a CT Scan but were not certain yet as to what exactly happened. My world as I knew it came crashing down. This cannot possibly be right, I must have fallen asleep during Matt's football game. There is no way this is real. I felt completely helpless and numb. This is my Sister. The most amazing, vibrant, active person that I know. This cannot be happening to her.
It was by the grace of God that I made it to Richmond (alone) as I was crying the entire time. By the time I got there she had been moved from St. Mary's to MCV's Critical Care Hospital on the Neuro Science ICU floor. At this point the doctors are certain that either a vein or aneurysm has ruptured even though it didn't show on the CT Scan, so they scheduled her for an angiogram first thing Tuesday morning. I stayed the night at the hospital with Mama and Sister. Seeing my Sister in so much pain just breaks my heart. I don't know how I've been able to keep it together for her and remain so strong, but then again its my job. She's my baby sister and I will always be whatever she needs me to be for her. She had use of all body parts, was able to speak clearing and put together full sentences and had her memory. We were blessed.
Tuesday the angiogram again showed no signs of aneurysm. Either it ruptured and clotted itself (still a change of rebleed) or it was a vein that ruptured (one time--no risk of rebleed). They set her up for another angiogram the following Monday August 27th. The next few days were rough with intense migraine headaches, nausea, vomiting and sensitivity to light. We were in a holding pattern waiting to see how her body would react. The aneurysm rupturing was like an earthquake and now we were waiting for the aftershocks. A lot of folks ask me why don't they just remove the blood. Well, research has shown that doing an invasive surgery to remove the blood does not reduce the risk of possible side effects: vaso spasms, stroke, siezures, etc. It's less of a risk to let the blood dissolve on its own just like with any regular bruise.
She did well that week, each day showing more spirit wanting to allow in more visitors and always smiling and giving us a glimpse of that wonderful sense of humor she has.
Monday, August 27th rolled around and this time was different. We could feel it. We didn't get updates and it was taking much longer than the previous angiogram. After 5.5 hours and no information I finally got someone to provide my Mama with an update, come to find out Sister was already back at her ICU room. We go rushing back over and Dr. Tony came out to give us a quick update before Dr. Simon would give us all the details. During the angiogram she went into vaso spasm, they provided her medicine and then immediately intubated her to keep her calm and stable. They immediately also put in a shunt, drainage tube, to her brain to help relieve some pressure that will help with her headaches and also help with the vaso spasms. Intubating my Sister does anything but help keep her calm. Dr. Simon, her neurologist, told us that he had found the aneurysm, but due to the size and shape would be unable to coil it. A craniotomy would be needed. However, due to the vaso spasms the risk of the surgery sky rockets so it would have to wait until she was in the clear. She remained intubated all night. But they had to keep her lightly sedated because they still need to check her vitals and do their tests to check for signs of stroke. She wrote letters to the nurse all night. She could see "lighting" in her head caused by the vaso spasms. The doctors have been floored by her ability to remain so sharp and lucid even with the heavy amounts of sedation she had been given. Any "normal" person wouldn't have been able to do so. Malissa is a fighter, there is no doubt about that.
Tuesday morning they decided to remove her intubation. At which time she has a stroke and loses sensation and movement in her entire left side. The vaso spasms caused blood vessels to constrict and cut off blood flow to a part of her brain. They did an emergency surgery to balloon the vessels back open and hopefully restore blood flow back without any brain cells "dying". Within 24 hours she had full sensation and movement back in her left side. They set her schedule for her craniotomy for Tuesday September 4th. She had a good week. She did struggle a bit with the severity of the surgery that she would undertake. Saturday, September 1st was my favorite day of all. Matt, Noah and I had come back down for the day to visit. Noah was napping but Sister wanted to see him so Matt brought him in. We stayed with her for a long time and just talked, joked and chatted. She was finally at a really good place about having the surgery which lifted my spirits. When Noah woke up he was so excited to see her (and pooh bear). She had less wires and ivs now so I pillowed her up to block them all off from dystructo baby and he was able to sit in her lap and they played together for a while. Melted my heart. I love seeing the two of them together.
We weren't originally planning to stay the night, but we did. THANK GOD! My Mama called me at 3:30 am on Sunday that she had another stroke which caused a grand mal seizure. The CT scan showed that her aneurysm had bled again. The only good news out of this entire situation is that it changed the shape of the aneurysm allowing them to coil it immediately that day during emergency surgery. They had to keep her intubated because of her pressure levels. She lost her left side again. But during that first 24 hours she had regained sensation and some movement. Thankfully she has her age and health on her side, I have no doubt in my mind with some PT she will be able to make a full recovery. On Monday morning her ICP (intercranial pressure) spiked. They put in two new drainage tubes to help relieve the pressure, but she is so aggressive about the intubation that they decided to put her in a medically induced coma which is where she has been since Monday. Any time she came into contact with any stimulation (even though she is in a medically induced coma) she would respond and her levels would spike. All stimuli (moving her for scans and our family visiting) has been removed which has allowed her levels to be low and stable for the past few days.
The outpouring of love and support that Sister and our family has received has been amazing. Her work group has been providing meals, her friends have come to help with shifts so she is never alone (this was before the coma) and the kind words and messages that I've been asked to pass along have been so encouraging and uplifting that I've been brought to tears several times. My Sister is and always has been an amazing loving person, and it makes me so proud that she has touched so many people and they realize what a wonderful person she is. Some of her friends even started a
website for her!
Please don't let any moments pass you by: forgive, love and make the most of your life! And please keep my Sister in your prayers! :)
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| A sister is a gift from God, sent from above to make life worthwhile here below. |
